Don't believe the hype

Living in a small town in the Poconos isn't as good as it seems! And people who are old enough to move and choose where they live; how lucky are they?! R5 sucks now and Main Street Jukebox is dead. While school doesn't have too many jerks, there is an ample number of idiots. Not even the skiing is great anymore. I could change things up a bit.

SoundtracK. TOK

Who's seen Dead Man? I don't think any other film has a better original score. Les Parapluies de Cherbourg? I bet not, but I don't know. Haven't seen it yet. Yeah, that probably is better, just because of the relation.

Dead Man was one of the best movies I've ever seen. If it was made today the soundtrack would probably be something stupid like Godspeed You! Black Emperor but thankfully Neil Young pulled this out. Another neat thing about the movie: Gibby Haynes is in it!

Oh, soundtracks? A good one is Reservoir Dogs.

K. TOKs his favorites: DJ Pica Pica Pica

All I can say is: "Ramayana monkey chant FTW!!!" I'm listening to track 1.

Any experts know what's better, DJ 光光光 or DJ Chaos X? Oh forget it, I'll figure it out.

Kiptok Ripoff...k

Who listened to that Jena Malone track they just put up on Pitchfork? Okay, anyway I listened to it. I liked Donnie Darko! Click on the link. Paul Simon's the best... I mean, Graceland is one of my favorite albums! But listen to that stumbling guitar line his son plays. That's so "Undone." People have heard of Weezer, man! That's crazy!

Kriptoffks

This Heat "Paper Hats" ripped off by Young People "The Night of the Hunter"
Yes, right? Thank you thank you I deserve a Pulitzer right but credit goes to my friend SLY who actually noticed it when I sent her the This Heat track. Kill Young People!

Apples In Stereo "Go" ripped off by Tokyo Police Club "Nature of the Experiment"
This is pretty obvious. I guess TPC didn't think their fans would be into Elephant6. Okay maybe bands just like telling each other when to start playing. Either way I don't care because Tokyo Police Club's track kills everything.

Kraftwerk "Computer Love" ripped off by Coldplay "Talk"
Don't believe me? Yes you do.

I can't think of anymore right now.

Bonus: Daft Punk

Did I miss something? Email me at kiptok@gmail.com and I'll post it in a future "Kriptoffks!"

Dismemberists Video

I thought this was a great video, almost as good as that Mistah F.A.B. "Ghost Ride It" one. Apart from the lame subtitles trick that every young director is doing these days, the video feels like The Warriors 2 and now I kind of like a track from an album that I thought was pretty boring. Which should be the goal.

F JOHNNY BRENDA'S

Since the addition of 21+ venue "Johnny Brenda's", Philadelphia "Do It Yourself" music organizers Sean Agnew and R5 Productions are abandoning their primary goal, as stated in the "INFO" section of their website.

R5 Productions is a "Do It Yourself" show promotions agency owned and operated by Sean Agnew whose main goal is to provide the Philadelphia area with cheap, friendly, all ages shows, in a honest intimate setting. Philadelphia suffers from a lack of a medium sized all ages venue, creating a situation in which band often play other major east coast cities such as New York or D.C. , but skip over Philadelphia.

I don't know Sean that well but I bet he is influenced by the '80s hardcore scene (e.g. anything to do with Ian Mackaye) in terms of providing a means for young people to hear good music even going one step further by circumventing the entire x's on the hands thing that they used to do. And he's done extremely well, I applaud this guy. Anyone who gets the Boredoms to play near me deserves it. But now, how is this Johnny Brenda's thing possibly beneficial to anyone? Last month when I saw Man Man at the First Unitarian Church, the first thing that caught me was that probably more than half of the audience were young kids i.e. under 21, like they just endured an entire day at school in anticipation of this amazing event, in the same way as my friend Chris and I did. We even met a ton of kids our age (16) who were having the time of their lives, inebriated and trying to get me to dance to some sucky opener band and taking photos of each other. In fact, there was a kid whom I recognized from the Boredoms concert, taking photos of the band like he was some photography prodigy with the press like Buscapé from City of God.

I did read the email that Sean sent to his mailing list, reasoning that costs have gone up and they apparently lose money everytime they host an all-ages show, but there must be a more favorable alternative than to just start going 21+ now! Most shows are still all-ages, but still: Dalek, Clinic, Magik Markers, Black Lips, Menomena, John Vanderslice, Deerhunter etc. are all going over to Johnny Brenda's instead of maybe the Starlight Ballroom or First Unitarian Church or even the Theater of Living Arts. I just don't understand how restricting the audience by cutting out all high-school students, most college students and all elementary schoolers is going to increase revenue. Alcohol is still sold at most all-ages concerts, am I missing something here? Plus, shows at Johnny Brenda's still have the same ticket prices, sometimes even lower than all-ages concerts. Even if it's a more viable venue in terms of funds, expenses etc. is it really so much more affordable that probably half the audience is being cut out? Seriously, kids love Menomena! All my friends are into John Vanderslice! Obviously people are going to take the fake ID route, and Agnew probably knows that so does he really want people breaking the law? I can't do this anyway because I'm still 5' 6.5", have the face of a toddler and I'm always called "the baby" by my parents.

Sorry, maybe this is a selfish rant, but when I see Deerhunter so close and yet so far like this it annoys me. Here's a suggestion Sean: your shows are so insanely cheap ($8-10 usually) that inflation included it's probably less costly to get in than even those $5 Fugazi gigs (I'm not even a Fugazi fan but Ian Mackaye is a hero for doing this). So you say you lose cash each time? Maybe add on $5 or so to the price; we're crafty, we can pull it together. Ask for volunteers, I'd devote all of my time to helping out if I lived in Philly. Or you could put one of those jars with a slit cut into the lid somewhere and we'd donate $$$$$$$. Just stop doing this 21+ thing. You even tell us to wait until we're 21 like we'll stay in Pennsylvania our whole lives? Please, Sean.

Suckiest P & J in history

First of all: Bob Dylan?! Suddenly this poll is dominated by old folks? Christgau is older than everyone in the poll combined, so only he's allowed to do this (No offense, you're still my idol). But seriously, anyone who voted for Modern Times hasn't listened to Blonde on Blonde or even Desire since they came out, probably.

Who did Rob Harvilla invite, his parents????

Singles list is somewhat better, but the mere presence of "Fergalicious" (117) hurts me.

My lists

Albums
10. Excepter - Alternation
I'm such a big fan of this band and that other one from Brooklyn (Black Dice) that I can't ever write reviews for either. This isn't quite as good as the entrancing masterpiece KA, but I'm enjoying the sluggish, droning pace that they are starting to use on this and "KKKKK".
9. Matmos - The Rose Has Teeth In The Mouth Of A Beast
Maybe it is pretentious to record an album full of dedications of which I only know two of the recipients, but I can't get enough of acts like Matmos and Herbert, who use phone books, artificial cow vaginas and medical equipment to make their music. My approach to music listening is flagrantly impatient, and old sounds don't interest me nearly as much as new sounds do. Of course, this doesn't mean the important stuff e.g. melody, rhythm, danceability can be thrown out the window... Matmos combines both well.
8. Destroyer - Destroyer's Rubies
This isn't really my kind of thing, and I knew it before I downloaded this album. Really, I think I leeched it off OiNK just to help my ratio when it got BNM, but on the second listen months later, it sounded like the perfect album. Nearly every track here is a hit; I love Bejar's voice, lyrics, hands on the guitar but track #1 is where everything is done flawlessly and my affinity for post-rock is beneficial to my enjoyment. His voice sounds like it's whispering into your ear, guiding you through the unknown while stereo sound is perfectly utilized with the percussion coming from both sides. Wow!! Plus, I don't like most lyricists but Dan Bejar does well for himself.
7. Current 93 - Black Ships Ate The Sky
This album sounds like a great written epic, motif (Idumæa) and everything. Featuring numerous takes, mostly beautiful, on one really old song, the guests almost steal it from Tibet here. Maybe this is a long way from the beginning of Current 93, but the entire medieval, apocalyptic feel of the album is so unsettling that the subdued, quiet feel of the whole thing does so much more for me than something like Whitehouse's Asceticists 2006. Also, I love Bonnie 'Prince' Billy, as you can see from my review of his "The Seedling", and when I hear his tortured, cracking voice, it feels like we're the only people on earth.
6. Girl Talk - Night Ripper
I knew this was my dream album, I knew it! When I heard "20 track mashup" or whatever in Sean Fennessey's review, I had to get this thing. By now, every possible combination of tracks has been mentioned ("'1 Thing' and 'Galang'? Now I've heard it all!") so let me just say that nothing else stayed this incredibly fun through the entire summer. But 1 thing: you'd think this is perfect music to play to a bunch of 14, 15, 16 year-olds, right? Just average kids who like, you know, Missy Elliot and Cascada and whatnot? Wrong. My film camp buddies hated this.
5. T.I. - King
Was this year really that good for rap? Yes, but everyone besides Tom Breihan seems to be picking the Ghostface or the Clipse over this amazing thing. Maybe it's this high only because of "What You Know". Whatev
4. Sunset Rubdown - Shut Up I Am Dreaming
This album is so emotional that I cry everytime the last traces of piano fade away from the final track. Not really. I'm too tough for that. This is what Wolf Parade should be like. Spencer Krug's voice is so shaky it might be hilarious if he sounded a little less earnest.
3. Man Man - Six Demon Bag
Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Best act of 2006 in my book. "Van Helsing Boombox" is my... Smells like teen spirit? I can't think of an analogy.
2. Liars - Drum's Not Dead
For the majority of 2006, this was IT! This was better than n0 Things. Obviously, I don't even know why I wrote that. Anyway, I think percussion is my all-time favorite rock instrument. Just look at how much I love Excepter's "Vacation" EP and Boredoms. Right? Maybe if Boredoms chilled out a little bit. Then some more. It would sound like this, but it probably would be better, just 'cause Boredoms is amazing hahaha but you know this still feels like waking up outside after the rapture.
1. Beach House - Beach House
Flawless record, I discovered right before I submitted my ballot. What does "Master of None" make me feel? I still can't pinpoint it, but the entire run is almost flawless. I hate stupid lengthy pauses and hidden tracks at the end. That made me mad when I used to listen to Dookie all the time.

Singles
10. Phoenix "Long Distance Call"
9. Hot Chip "Boy From School"
8. Blow "Parentheses"
7. Clipse "Trill"
6. Man Man "Engwish Bwuud"
5. Wolf Eyes "The Driller"
4. Lupe Fiasco "Kick, Push"
3. Kelis "Bossy (Alan Braxe & Fred Falke Remix)"
2. Beach House "Master of None"
1. T.I. "What You Know"